Thursday, March 22, 2012

War & Soul


Mighty Soul
Came to earth
To Live and laugh with the earth.
But instead of able to cherish the moment
All she got is resentment

Mighty Soul
Wandered the streets
Every inch of the blood soaked streets
She saw a child holding a bear
Instead of the toy, eyes were pouring tear

Mighty Soul
Started to cry
Thinking why do people die
She walked  hearing the death song
Dragging the dead bodies along

Mighty Soul
Roared in horror
Her Scream brought the white light nearer
She refused saying she was confused
Shecan’t leave till the people are ready to live.  

Photo Crtsy- zahraa-hassan.deviantart.com

Evil in Me

I met my angel on the road
He was one handsome broad
I asked him “is that halo on my head”
“No my dear you are a bit evil “he said
I was astonished asked “Is that so? “
He said “You are not that bad though”
I told him to make up his mind
He gave a smile open wide
He touched my hand asked me what I feel
Nothing but a breeze in real
He kissed me light and held me tight
His grip woke the whole of me
He pulled me near and whispered in my ear
“My dear, you are bit evil just for me” ;) 

Photo Crtsy-  cube-man.blogspot.com 

Monday, February 20, 2012

Unconditional Love


It has always made me wonder what unconditional love is… because most of us love to get love back. For the 1st time in this week I saw unconditional Love.

Today I went to a school for Special Children in a little town called Tirur. This was my 1st charity event in Kerala, I was bit scared how I would be around these kids. Coz all my little cousins are scared of me … I am the danger woman their moms call out for when it comes to feeding them.
Anyways, I got in with Junaid, and was looking so some other friendly faces. Gave a sigh of relief when I saw Darlu (Saneesh is the real name, I call him darlu, so do other women ;)). We started packing the chocolate for the kids and were having silly conversation amongst ourselves.
Darlu had his new camera with him. I was curious, so I asked “Shall I click today? “ He said why not. That moment I started connecting with people later with kids in the school. I started with silly photos of the boys in our group; we were waiting for other to join before we could start the fun activities.
 I clicked and clicked and clicked, suddenly a little hand poked me. I was like ok time to face reality. I look into the little face which was smiling at me, I smiled back. She asked “What your name “ , I said “ Neethu, what’s yours ?”. She replied with a shy smile “ Maufina “. I asked the child”  Sweety can I click a picture of you,  her smile brightens up and she jumped with joy “ yes yes !! “ . I clicked moufina and when looked at the photo again ii release “I am good at this “. So I asked her to smile again. Then she wanted me to click her friend pictures, which I did with lot of enthusiasm.
I moved on the next set of kids who have similar questions for. “ What’s your name?” “What are u doing here “and “where is your home “. I met another girl in this group who was interested in me and what I am doing. She looked so normal I was astonished that she is even part of this special school. I enquired with the teacher about her and came to know the my little Shabana just looks normal and acts normal but does not have basic understanding of what’s going around her and have not what so ever capability of learning another.  I sighed and moved on with my agenda of clicking more innocent faces.
While clicking I heard someone crying , it was more of a scream , I walked towards the sound and found a little boy holding tight to window railing and crying I went to him and asked “ Whats wrong? “  He didn’t say anything, just looked at me and screamed again. A teacher came by and told me that the little boys mom had just left him here and he wanted her to come back to take him. I sat with him for a while looking out of the window. Then I say the little eye oozing tears. I wiped the little face with my hand and told him not to cry. He looked at me blankly and the looked towards the window and cried again. I was depressed, with experience of my age I should be able to make a kid smile. I was of no use I thought. Then Abdu saw me struggling with a kid and he joined us. We tried to cheer up little Arshad. Finally Abdu took over the task and I moved to another bunch of kids disappointed that I couldn’t do much.
Next set are kids who didn’t have their senses in control at all... A tall one smiled at me, I asked “Shall I take a photo of yours”. He gave a big wide smile. Ah!!  At last another bright smile to brighten my day!
While I was clicking photos of this kid, I saw another very teeny tiny boy taking a wooden play toy and going to hit the kid who was sitting next to him. I stopped clicking and kept my right hand between the toy and the kids head. The teachers saw and ran for the rescue.  The singing angel Thaha was safe. I left the scene for the teachers to handle.
I was walking around when Junu came and said “We have a surprise for you “He led me to the little Arsha. Oh my god he was smiling, he was actually smiling …. Thanks to Abdu and his tickling game.  I went close and clicking some pics of the little weeper and his cheerful clown (No offence Abdu – You were great with the kid). 
After enjoying the little ones joy for a while I moved out to pick a call when rest our gang arrived. After cheerful hello we started the program. It started with a brief introduction and then went on with some kids singing and performing.  All in all it went well. After the program I sat in a corner with the kids. When Tiny Alana came and sat on my lap. She was already my favorite model in the gala. She sat and played with me for a while when Nair chetan (Malayalam for elder brother) came and sat with us. He clicked photo of me and Alana. After that he showed Alana to play a tickle game which she enjoyed with him for a while.
Lunch time was sweet. Even with their problems I was amazed with the order the kids went and sat for their lunch. After the lunch was done, our gang sat in the portico and was chitchatting when Shabana came and called me in. She said “Are you leaving us chechi? “, “no why you asked like that Shabana”. She said “why don’t you come and sit with us then” I went in and sat among the kids. Little Alana came to me and amazingly she remember the game Nair chetan had taught her a while back and started playing with me without me initiating. After playing for a while I got up and suddenly Shabana took my hand and kissed it. I was touched by the gesture and was looking at her with a smile when Maufina asked “Can I give you a kiss? “. I was astonished by the love and hugs I got from all the kids.
I was given special attention by the singing angel Thaha. Thaha was not in sense but was singing a song going in circles. I asked the kid to stop but he didn’t even look at me or even noticed that I m trying to stop him. A Teacher came and told me that he can go in circles the whole day without tiring or fainting.  And he sings advertisement songs whichever he hears on TV. I smiled and look back at the poor soul that was trapped in this situation.  I thanks god for giving me health then.  What I didn’t realize during this scene is he was actually noticing me. He had taken a special interest in me. Because for next full hours he was coming and standing close to me, touching my dupatta and even holding my hand dragging me along with him where ever he wanted to go.  Other told me to be careful with the kid as he was a violent one. But he didn’t hurt me a bit .He was gentle with me as much as he could.

Well tell me isn't this whats called unconditional love ?








Thursday, February 9, 2012

Why men are better friends than women


So we have heard loads of stories about two men or group of men being friends for a really long time.  But only few similar stories about women.
Men like to believe because they are better than women. My Response “Aha THAT’S WHY! “
Well here is what I have seen in all these friendship. Men don’t talk! They hide their deep desires and secret from other male friends. They like to show they are the coolest, funkiest and the hero their friends want to be with. 99.98 % (My head calculated), “men” best friend don’t know the real deal about their friend. All said when trouble comes these are the same guys saying “Sale tu fikar mat kar mein hu na “
Now let’s take women, let’s admit it gals WE ARE BITCHES! Yup we like to talk, share and of course bitch. Some are harmful bad ass bitches and some sweet little cute bitches that don’t hurt anyone. But this same quality doesn’t work with friendship. We say what we want to say and end up being alone …
Again there are women who are sweet friend who will do anything for their buddies. And never break trust.
About friendship
1.       I believe that friendship should not be conditional – I will be friend with you if you do this ( I know you are nodding with agreement )
2.       When friendship breaks doesn’t mean you leave the trust and give out all the secrets. ( 80% of men and women are culprits in this situation)
3.       Ego the nemesis of Friendship.
4.       Boys try telling the guys friend about the real you. May be they will love it.
5.       Girls think before you speak. Sometime friend is more important that your opinion.
6.       Everything has exception. 
Conclusion – We are all human (Emotional being ) – We love each other , but everyone in a different way.
Love you my friends. I always will. 

Monday, January 2, 2012

Have a Awesome Time there Grandma

Dear Grandma, 

You were sweet and you wanted to be with me all the time. I am sorry i was not able to with you when you wanted me. Today you are gone and I dont know how to tell you this. I am sure you are out there spreading love to the other world. Keep Rocking .... I will always regret that I was not able to be there when you took your last breath. But I believe that every time i breath you are there in that. Coz after all I am your grandchild.

Since you are up there Thank god for me for bringing me in such a nice Family. Love you :)

Regards, 

Your Neethu molu .

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Ghost within me ..

In the busy life of Bangalore city I always opted for change. Changing homes had become a hobby ... just couldn't stay at the same place for long. There was something within me that made me change my hair style every three months and home every six.
Last Aug with a mind-blowing party I said goodbye to my roommate who was going back home to Koorg and I took a Kannada style penthouse near my office.
As usual I furnished it to a home and in few weeks something started happening. Staying alone was never a problem for me ... I was always a loner when it comes to staying and sleeping. But this house use to give me the creeps in the night. I could handle insomnia not the nightmares. The weird thoughts about murder and suicide which I have never considered a part of me. Seeing myself dying in different way in dream made me think I am crazy.

I, a non believer who could never tell her mom that she didn't believe in god. But paranormal has always caught  my attention. So some say if you believe in ghost you should believe in God too. hmmm or was it the other way around. Anyways, the 1st paranormal activity in the house was moving water bottles. Yeah it can be my imagination but  I was finding the water bottle in the living-room in the morning not next to me where i kept it before sleeping. Definitely my imagination!! I thought I was sleepwalking. But never told a soul about it.

First crazy and now sleepwalking - Asylum here I come !! Errrr let me forget that I said that to myself...

Regular visit home - Went home for a weekend and my dad insisted that I should visit the astrologer. So there I was sitting in front of my dad's childhood friend and famous astrologer.

He caught my attention when he guessed that I stay in 2nd floor of the building, which even my folks didn't know. Suddenly he said " How quick can you move out of that house". I looked blankly towards him. He said" I don't want to scare you kid, but there is a ghost in your house and you should not go back there"

He said he cant explain everything to me, but there was suicide in that house sometime back and the tormented spirit is not able to get out of the house. Also that there is the possibility that it has possessed me once in a while.

I am a no believer but this took the bejezzes out of me. He gave me a talisman for my wrist and told me to move out the house ASAP. And I agreed.

I came back to Bangalore, and started staying with my friends. Which I knew was not for long term but since I had already planned move back to Kerala , I didn't know what to do with the 3 months I had here... Every time I visited the house something was wrong with it...

One day I went to clean the house and pack my stuff so that i can take everything home.

I got in and I remember that someone has switched off the the power supply. My fridge was home for countless maggots. All the windows were open so was the almiras and lockers . Green gram sprinkled all around the kitchen. Was it the ghost or someone was in the house ? I still dont know. I cleaned that Fridge with a friends help and we could here a knocking sound with no source. I had enough with the house. I shifted the next weekend.


After that I stayed with my friends for some days and later shifted to a paying guest accomadation.

 I still don't know what hit me. But this definitely  made me stronger, like the gurdian angel is looking over me. I still don't know the reason. Was it the ghost or was it something within me!


Thursday, July 14, 2011

I am a hypocrite- God Bless the Sneeze Literally!!



Environmental concern always bothered me. Last year this time I was planning on events and campaign to save environment. Yes for a smaller crowd and I agree that I was no revolutionist, but I was trying to do my bit.
I wanted to join hands with Green Peace and UNEP one day and bring life to the dying planet.
This was me last year…
Today I woke up and sneezed, that one sec of brain jerk remained me that I am lost. I have forgotten about my aim, the goal. I have not written or done anything on my cause for over 6 months. Forget about being an activist, I have started using plastic again, have been wasting paper and have been forgetting to turn off the lights.
I realize that I can’t save the planet on my own. But inspiration is all people need.  So this is it, from today I am back on my loving path.
God Bless the Sneeze Literally!!